[ ...Yeah, this got about a dozen times more awkward in the time it took Mayuzumi to get from the entrance to Akashi's door. Now he's here with a plate of homemade cookies in hand, fresh from a brief conversation with the older lady who manages the place and a round of "thanks for looking out for him"s and it feels beyond incongruous to him. ]
Uh...here, from your landlady.
[ He'll just kind of palm the plate off into Akashi's hands once he's inside. ]
You know, it's really impressive how you can get so many people to go soft on you sometimes.
[ Including the guy who's standing in front of Akashi now, who's here to talk things out and smooth things over even when he's the one who's technically in the right over what they're disagreeing about. ]
[ As vulnerable as he might be right now, he can't help but make a face when Mayuzumi hands him a plate of cookies. It's not because of the cookies, though. His landlady makes excellent cookies... the oatmeal raisin kind because Akashi is an old man. She's very flirty, that's all. That cougar. ]
She can be rather touchy with me.
[ Aaaand that seems to be a good enough ice breaker. ]
[ So much for smoothing things over; Mayuzumi's looking less than impressed by this new information.
This guy was just going on about linking our souls together but he lets that lady paw him??
It's one thing for older women to fuss over Akashi. Hell, every lunch lady at the Rakuzan cafeteria used to be like that; the guy's cute and that Polite Young Man aura that housewife types coo over just pours off of him when he's not being a total extraterrestrial.
But this and that are different things! ]
...Hey. I understand being polite, but don't let yourself get taken advantage of.
[ He seems to think that Mayuzumi is concerned about that. Nothing's really happened beyond the cookies and juice and pie. . . a lot of the desserts in Akashi's fridge are from her. ]
She visits often to make sure I've eaten, that's all. There was a time she hugged me, but it hasn't happened since I try to maintain some distance between us when we meet in the hall. She lives upstairs in the penthouse.
[ Oh. That's certainly an invitation, and Akashi looks a little surprised by it. Not a bad kind, at least. His cheeks flush pink and he looks away for a few moments. ]
You can stay whenever you'd like.
[ ... Mayuzumi could stay forever if he wants, but Akashi's quick to remember their conversation prior to the visit here. ]
...You really didn't get what I was saying before at all, huh.
[ He suspected misunderstanding might've had something to do with why Akashi just disengaged from him over the network, anyway. They're really going to have to work this out step by step it seems.
But even if it's a hassle, he's the one who decided not to just let it go here. ]
Let me ask you this, since you're the guy who technically has more experience with this stuff than I do. What kind of things do you think people who're dating generally do?
[ What an odd question to ask? Akashi sort of stares at Mayuzumi, confused, but the expression only lasts for a few seconds.
Admittedly, Akashi doesn't have much knowledge on what dating entails. When he decided that he liked Miu, it was because he was jealous of her admirers. With Emerald, it was because he couldn't stop thinking about her after they kissed in the closet. He's not actively seeking a partner, because apart from being too young to be dating, his priorities are a little more focused on academics, sports, and business. It's changed because of the people he's met, but he's still not somebody who constantly craves romance. That's why the question is a little weird. ]
A lot of things. I'm not really sure what you mean, though.
[ Mayuzumi seems to have a specific answer in mind, though, so Akashi waits for it. ]
What I'm trying to get at is that you and I obviously have different ideas about what dating means. I'm not an all or nothing kind of guy like you.
[ He raises his hand, using his fingers to list off the points as he says them; his cheeks might flush a little after he reaches that fourth point, but he says it evenly. ]
Spending time together. Going out on dates. Getting each other presents. Making out and having sex. Sleeping over. That's the kind of things I do with Emerald that I wanna do with you, too.
It's only been a few months with her and way less than that with you. It's way too soon for me to be thinking about heavy stuff like getting engaged or married or this soulbinding stuff you're getting worked up about.
[ He swallows and looks away. ]
...Someday I might want to do that stuff, sure, but...I'm not ready for that yet.
[ He feels like he's explaining things that should be obvious to a guy who's been in more relationships than him, but it really seems like Akashi somehow missed the memo on how dating for normal people usually works. ]
You said that. That's why I asked... if you sleeping over would be too fast.
[ He's a little quiet when he says it. Being... considerate is both natural and foreign to Akashi. He's realised that Mayuzumi thinks it's too soon after their conversation, that's why he hung up. He made a mistake and embarrassed himself. Maybe he should say something about that.
Well, you know...I think we both have things to work on. I'm not always upfront about what's on my mind, I know that.
[ Akashi's subdued expression makes Mayuzumi draw closer; he rests his hand on Akashi's head like he has before, but this time he's standing at a more intimate distance than he did in the past. He isn't just Akashi's senpai anymore, but a boyfriend offering some soothing affection. ]
It's fine, though. I didn't get angry or anything like that. It was just kind of a lot all at once, that's all.
[ And now he's the one who's looking kind of embarrassed. ]
I...uh, was worried when you cut me off like that. I thought maybe you were beating yourself up over us disagreeing and all that. I just wanted to make sure you understood where I was coming from.
But yeah, sleeping over's okay. You stayed over with me already anyway.
[ He did beat himself up over it. Mistakes aren't allowed, and if he keeps making them, then Mayzumi may not want to have anything to do with Akashi anymore. Somehow, he trusts Emerald more when she says she'd never leave him. It's different with Mayuzumi because it's become part of his system that he constantly needs to seek for the other boy's approval. Maybe it's because he's Akashi's senpai.
His eyes close and he moves his head a little to feel more of Mayuzumi's hand, though. It really is comforting like this, and Akashi feels a lot better because of it and the close distance between the two of them. It's warm. ]
Then, tell me when you'd like to stay over. I'll make sure the fridge is well-stocked.
[ He has enough food, but he also doesn't really have much because of his landlady?? She cooks for him... ]
[ Mayuzumi wasn't planning for this, but he didn't actually plan anything about ending up on Akashi's doorstep to begin with. He'd just followed his concern without even thinking about it the moment Akashi withdrew himself; Mayuzumi's long since realized that the guy can put too much pressure on himself to maintain that image of being perfect at everything.
But Akashi isn't a student council president or captain of a basketball team or even the heir to some important and very rich family name here; he's just Akashi, just Emerald and Mayuzumi's boyfriend, and he can just be naturally himself with an allowance for the occasional screwup like everyone else.
His other hand takes one of Akashi's, fingers curling around fingers, some more color entering his cheeks. ]
I'm here right now. And you've got cookies, that's good enough.
[ It's not what's in Akashi's fridge that really matters to Mayuzumi... ]
[ Most of the time, Akashi's pretty capable of keeping his expressions in check. He's a lot more honest when with Emerald and Mayuzumi because they've both seen him in the most extreme of downs and ups. He still has to protect himself, though. He still has to hide when he's embarrassed and not be as angry as he is on the inside. When with them, he can be honest but he still also has a reputation to uphold. They like him for who they see, that's why any slip ups aren't allowed.
When Mayuzumi invites himself to stay over today, it's impossible for Akashi to keep a straight face. His heart even thumps in excitement because even though he made a mistake earlier, Mayuzumi still came for him and they talked about it. He even says he'll stay with Akashi, and that makes the redhead very pleased and excited and thankful. His smile grows wide like an excited child's. ]
Really?
[ But he catches himself. That's too much, and his cheeks turn red when he realises it. ]
Ah, I'm sorry. I'm... [ Excited? Thankful? Both. ] You can't have cookies for dinner. [ There, that's definitely more like himself now. ] There's salad and soup that we can have, instead.
[ Okay, that reaction's cute enough that Akashi gets a small huff of laughter and some ruffled hair in response. Sometimes it's hard to believe this is the same guy who used to intimidate the hell out of Rakuzan's basketball team.
But there was also something about the Akashi back then that made Mayuzumi put up with such an insufferable guy bugging him even when it wasn't really strictly required, too. Getting to see this side of Akashi's a gift that maybe makes all the associated headaches worth it... ]
Then sit down. [ Akashi tugs on Mayuzumi's hand so he can have him sit down. He's a little more relaxed now, which means he's back to being that boy who takes care of and fusses over everybody. ]
What would you like to drink?
[ Oh... and if Mayuzumi's staying over, does he need a shirt for sleeping? Akashi's a lot smaller than Mayuzumi is in terms of built. His shirts won't fit on him, so he just... stares at Mayuzumi for a bit before blurting out his realisation. ]
[ Mayuzumi does comply, having a seat on Akashi's sofa and taking a discreet glance around. ]
Ah, I guess juice or tea's fine.
[ That other declaration draws his focus right back to the guy, though; logistics like that just weren't on his mind at all until Akashi brings it up. ]
And don't worry about it. It's not cold or anything so I can sleep without one, I guess.
[ If that means Akashi might end up curled against Mayuzumi's bare chest in the middle of the night, that...doesn't particularly bother Mayuzumi at all. ]
You could get sick. [ He frowns at the thought. No one can get sick while he's around! Though... ] I suppose we can just switch the heater on. The blankets I have are warm, too.
[ Basically, he'll take care of Mayuzumi while he's here. Mayuzumi doesn't have to worry about anything. ]
[ Akashi might be fussing over Mayuzumi like a mom right now, but it doesn't bother him.
...Or a housewife, which brings to mind out of nowhere the image of Akashi in a cute apron making Mayuzumi dinner and feeding him bites of food and otherwise relentlessly doting on him and floods a little pink into his cheeks.
He clears his throat and glances off to the side to try and banish those particular thoughts. ]
I suppose that works, but maybe next time I stay over I'll leave a couple of extra shirts here just in case.
...Although...you can always help keep me warm too if I get cold, can't you?
Sounds like I'll be fine then as long as I'm in your care, so I'm not worried.
[ Yeah, Mayuzumi's messing with the guy a little, even if his own face is flushed pink right now. After all, if Akashi's showing Mayuzumi more of a side of himself that he didn't before, that's a shift that flows both ways. Maybe he should've added "teasing your girl/boyfriend to see them blush cutely" to the list of things he thinks dating should be all about that he recited before, because he definitely thinks it is...
They're still partners, still friends, and there's a lot in that regard that isn't really any different. But there's also more to their relationship now that romantic attachment's thrown into the mix. Teasing, flirting, affectionate feelings, emotional vulnerability, physical intimacy; there's so many new facets to the deepening of their bond that Mayuzumi's still feeling out expressing. ]
[ That's definitely one of the nicest things Mayuzumi's said to Akashi. It means he's trusted completely, and that means a lot. Even more so now than ever. Mayuzumi's really made Akashi happy today, even though they had a misunderstanding earlier and he wanted the ground to swallow him whole for making such a huge mistake. ]
You shouldn't. I'll make sure nothing happens to you, Mayuzumi-san.
[ He doesn't sound embarrassed at all saying that. Beyond it being a job he has to do, he likes doing it. When he cares about someone, he'll go a long way for them. He'll make sure nothing happens to them. That annoyingly sweet prince charming smile of his is back when he says it, too.
But it disappears quickly when he decides he wants to do something. With Emerald, he doesn't have to say it, but since this relationship with Mayuzumi is new, he feels like he has to ask. ]
[ Mayuzumi swallows, glancing off to the side; Akashi saying something like that completely straight with that ridiculous smile attached is definitely embarrassing! This is what the guy should really be blushing about.
Mayuzumi's not used to having Akashi's absurd princely expression directed at him with this kind of sentiment attached, and it makes his cheeks noticeably darker. It's really annoying that he feels a fluttery sensation now in his stomach about what used to be a purely irritating look; his immunity to that sparkling aura has definitely gotten a lot weaker.
It seems like it's his turn to be the flustered one now, apparently... ]
...But yeah. I mean, you can kiss me whenever you want.
[ Akashi explicitly asks for permission because he doesn't want Mayuzumi to think that he's too eager. Anything to fast and Mayuzumi might not want this anymore... and even though it's only been a few weeks since they talked about their feelings, he's not sure he can have Mayuzumi in his life any other way. They can't just go back to being friends. Akashi doesn't think he can handle that.
He sits down on the couch next to Mayuzumi and leans in. His hand rests on the other's shoulder to anchor himself, so he doesn't topple over even with the weight he's adding to one side of the couch. And when his lips touch Mayuzumi's, he immediately feels like he's on fire. The kiss he gives isn't deep or passionate, rather, it's soft and reserved, a little bit shy. Akashi is not that kind of person, but he just wants to kiss him and be close. ]
[ There's a soft kind of sigh that escapes Mayuzumi just from how gentle the brush of Akashi's lips against his is. It's a sweet and unhurried kind of kiss, and Mayuzumi follows along with the flow of that feeling, leaning in, tracing a caress over Akashi's cheek. A wonderful warmth flows out from his chest and through the rest of him that's only heightened by the moonlacing effect, and he pours that affection back out into the press of their mouths, a feeling that's both delicate and intense all at once.
Ah hell, he...really has it pretty bad for this guy. Forever might not be an idea Mayuzumi's prepared to fully grapple with, but he also can't see any end in sight to how he feels. His doubts over whether this step was entirely the right one for them to take have proven to be insubstantial worries that dissipate whenever they're in each others' arms.
If they're making a mistake it's the best one he's ever made and he intends to keep on repeating it for the foreseeable future. ]
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Uh...here, from your landlady.
[ He'll just kind of palm the plate off into Akashi's hands once he's inside. ]
You know, it's really impressive how you can get so many people to go soft on you sometimes.
[ Including the guy who's standing in front of Akashi now, who's here to talk things out and smooth things over even when he's the one who's technically in the right over what they're disagreeing about. ]
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She can be rather touchy with me.
[ Aaaand that seems to be a good enough ice breaker. ]
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[ So much for smoothing things over; Mayuzumi's looking less than impressed by this new information.
This guy was just going on about linking our souls together but he lets that lady paw him??
It's one thing for older women to fuss over Akashi. Hell, every lunch lady at the Rakuzan cafeteria used to be like that; the guy's cute and that Polite Young Man aura that housewife types coo over just pours off of him when he's not being a total extraterrestrial.
But this and that are different things! ]
...Hey. I understand being polite, but don't let yourself get taken advantage of.
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[ He seems to think that Mayuzumi is concerned about that. Nothing's really happened beyond the cookies and juice and pie. . . a lot of the desserts in Akashi's fridge are from her. ]
She visits often to make sure I've eaten, that's all. There was a time she hugged me, but it hasn't happened since I try to maintain some distance between us when we meet in the hall. She lives upstairs in the penthouse.
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[ Visits often, he says.
Fine, so he's feeling kind of jealous. ]
Well. I do believe you, but maybe I should start sleeping over sometimes. She might get the hint if I answer the door one morning instead of you.
[ Especially if he's half-dressed in the kind of way that makes it clear he's not just a pal crashing on Akashi's couch for the evening.... ]
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You can stay whenever you'd like.
[ ... Mayuzumi could stay forever if he wants, but Akashi's quick to remember their conversation prior to the visit here. ]
That's not too fast?
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[ He suspected misunderstanding might've had something to do with why Akashi just disengaged from him over the network, anyway. They're really going to have to work this out step by step it seems.
But even if it's a hassle, he's the one who decided not to just let it go here. ]
Let me ask you this, since you're the guy who technically has more experience with this stuff than I do. What kind of things do you think people who're dating generally do?
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Admittedly, Akashi doesn't have much knowledge on what dating entails. When he decided that he liked Miu, it was because he was jealous of her admirers. With Emerald, it was because he couldn't stop thinking about her after they kissed in the closet. He's not actively seeking a partner, because apart from being too young to be dating, his priorities are a little more focused on academics, sports, and business. It's changed because of the people he's met, but he's still not somebody who constantly craves romance. That's why the question is a little weird. ]
A lot of things. I'm not really sure what you mean, though.
[ Mayuzumi seems to have a specific answer in mind, though, so Akashi waits for it. ]
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[ He raises his hand, using his fingers to list off the points as he says them; his cheeks might flush a little after he reaches that fourth point, but he says it evenly. ]
Spending time together. Going out on dates. Getting each other presents. Making out and having sex. Sleeping over. That's the kind of things I do with Emerald that I wanna do with you, too.
It's only been a few months with her and way less than that with you. It's way too soon for me to be thinking about heavy stuff like getting engaged or married or this soulbinding stuff you're getting worked up about.
[ He swallows and looks away. ]
...Someday I might want to do that stuff, sure, but...I'm not ready for that yet.
[ He feels like he's explaining things that should be obvious to a guy who's been in more relationships than him, but it really seems like Akashi somehow missed the memo on how dating for normal people usually works. ]
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[ He's a little quiet when he says it. Being... considerate is both natural and foreign to Akashi. He's realised that Mayuzumi thinks it's too soon after their conversation, that's why he hung up. He made a mistake and embarrassed himself. Maybe he should say something about that.
He swallows thickly before looking away. ]
I should have considered how you feel, too.
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[ Akashi's subdued expression makes Mayuzumi draw closer; he rests his hand on Akashi's head like he has before, but this time he's standing at a more intimate distance than he did in the past. He isn't just Akashi's senpai anymore, but a boyfriend offering some soothing affection. ]
It's fine, though. I didn't get angry or anything like that. It was just kind of a lot all at once, that's all.
[ And now he's the one who's looking kind of embarrassed. ]
I...uh, was worried when you cut me off like that. I thought maybe you were beating yourself up over us disagreeing and all that. I just wanted to make sure you understood where I was coming from.
But yeah, sleeping over's okay. You stayed over with me already anyway.
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His eyes close and he moves his head a little to feel more of Mayuzumi's hand, though. It really is comforting like this, and Akashi feels a lot better because of it and the close distance between the two of them. It's warm. ]
Then, tell me when you'd like to stay over. I'll make sure the fridge is well-stocked.
[ He has enough food, but he also doesn't really have much because of his landlady?? She cooks for him... ]
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[ Mayuzumi wasn't planning for this, but he didn't actually plan anything about ending up on Akashi's doorstep to begin with. He'd just followed his concern without even thinking about it the moment Akashi withdrew himself; Mayuzumi's long since realized that the guy can put too much pressure on himself to maintain that image of being perfect at everything.
But Akashi isn't a student council president or captain of a basketball team or even the heir to some important and very rich family name here; he's just Akashi, just Emerald and Mayuzumi's boyfriend, and he can just be naturally himself with an allowance for the occasional screwup like everyone else.
His other hand takes one of Akashi's, fingers curling around fingers, some more color entering his cheeks. ]
I'm here right now. And you've got cookies, that's good enough.
[ It's not what's in Akashi's fridge that really matters to Mayuzumi... ]
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When Mayuzumi invites himself to stay over today, it's impossible for Akashi to keep a straight face. His heart even thumps in excitement because even though he made a mistake earlier, Mayuzumi still came for him and they talked about it. He even says he'll stay with Akashi, and that makes the redhead very pleased and excited and thankful. His smile grows wide like an excited child's. ]
Really?
[ But he catches himself. That's too much, and his cheeks turn red when he realises it. ]
Ah, I'm sorry. I'm... [ Excited? Thankful? Both. ] You can't have cookies for dinner. [ There, that's definitely more like himself now. ] There's salad and soup that we can have, instead.
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But there was also something about the Akashi back then that made Mayuzumi put up with such an insufferable guy bugging him even when it wasn't really strictly required, too. Getting to see this side of Akashi's a gift that maybe makes all the associated headaches worth it... ]
That's not something you gotta apologize for.
Soup and salad's fine with me.
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What would you like to drink?
[ Oh... and if Mayuzumi's staying over, does he need a shirt for sleeping? Akashi's a lot smaller than Mayuzumi is in terms of built. His shirts won't fit on him, so he just... stares at Mayuzumi for a bit before blurting out his realisation. ]
I don't have any shirts that might fit you.
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Ah, I guess juice or tea's fine.
[ That other declaration draws his focus right back to the guy, though; logistics like that just weren't on his mind at all until Akashi brings it up. ]
And don't worry about it. It's not cold or anything so I can sleep without one, I guess.
[ If that means Akashi might end up curled against Mayuzumi's bare chest in the middle of the night, that...doesn't particularly bother Mayuzumi at all. ]
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[ Basically, he'll take care of Mayuzumi while he's here. Mayuzumi doesn't have to worry about anything. ]
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...Or a housewife, which brings to mind out of nowhere the image of Akashi in a cute apron making Mayuzumi dinner and feeding him bites of food and otherwise relentlessly doting on him and floods a little pink into his cheeks.
He clears his throat and glances off to the side to try and banish those particular thoughts. ]
I suppose that works, but maybe next time I stay over I'll leave a couple of extra shirts here just in case.
...Although...you can always help keep me warm too if I get cold, can't you?
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[ That's a little too embarrassing. Heat fills Akashi's cheeks and he has to look away. What is he even supposed to say to that?? ]
... yes.
[ He really would, but Mayuzumi doesn't need to say it?!?! ]
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[ Yeah, Mayuzumi's messing with the guy a little, even if his own face is flushed pink right now. After all, if Akashi's showing Mayuzumi more of a side of himself that he didn't before, that's a shift that flows both ways. Maybe he should've added "teasing your girl/boyfriend to see them blush cutely" to the list of things he thinks dating should be all about that he recited before, because he definitely thinks it is...
They're still partners, still friends, and there's a lot in that regard that isn't really any different. But there's also more to their relationship now that romantic attachment's thrown into the mix. Teasing, flirting, affectionate feelings, emotional vulnerability, physical intimacy; there's so many new facets to the deepening of their bond that Mayuzumi's still feeling out expressing. ]
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You shouldn't. I'll make sure nothing happens to you, Mayuzumi-san.
[ He doesn't sound embarrassed at all saying that. Beyond it being a job he has to do, he likes doing it. When he cares about someone, he'll go a long way for them. He'll make sure nothing happens to them. That annoyingly sweet prince charming smile of his is back when he says it, too.
But it disappears quickly when he decides he wants to do something. With Emerald, he doesn't have to say it, but since this relationship with Mayuzumi is new, he feels like he has to ask. ]
May I kiss you?
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[ Mayuzumi swallows, glancing off to the side; Akashi saying something like that completely straight with that ridiculous smile attached is definitely embarrassing! This is what the guy should really be blushing about.
Mayuzumi's not used to having Akashi's absurd princely expression directed at him with this kind of sentiment attached, and it makes his cheeks noticeably darker. It's really annoying that he feels a fluttery sensation now in his stomach about what used to be a purely irritating look; his immunity to that sparkling aura has definitely gotten a lot weaker.
It seems like it's his turn to be the flustered one now, apparently... ]
...But yeah. I mean, you can kiss me whenever you want.
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He sits down on the couch next to Mayuzumi and leans in. His hand rests on the other's shoulder to anchor himself, so he doesn't topple over even with the weight he's adding to one side of the couch. And when his lips touch Mayuzumi's, he immediately feels like he's on fire. The kiss he gives isn't deep or passionate, rather, it's soft and reserved, a little bit shy. Akashi is not that kind of person, but he just wants to kiss him and be close. ]
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Ah hell, he...really has it pretty bad for this guy. Forever might not be an idea Mayuzumi's prepared to fully grapple with, but he also can't see any end in sight to how he feels. His doubts over whether this step was entirely the right one for them to take have proven to be insubstantial worries that dissipate whenever they're in each others' arms.
If they're making a mistake it's the best one he's ever made and he intends to keep on repeating it for the foreseeable future. ]
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